Let’s talk about being nice…
…to ourselves! Ladies, we’ve got a serious problem when it comes to how we think of one of the things we should love with all our might: our bodies. Why are we constantly throwing shade at our high-performing, body-protecting, experience-making organ-carriers? Let me tell you why, (and it’s not just my husband’s nickname for WalMart) “The EVIL Empire.” The EVIL Empire is big, supremely wealthy, creative, far-reaching, and they have somehow wormed their way inside our heads. I’m going with #jerkstore Jerry! I have friends who I know are flaming hot-cheetos status, and even they pick apart their hips, thighs, split ends and touchy-thighs. Curse you EE.
Here’s the truth, when you and I and all our sisters all over the planet are in love with our hair, teeth, skin, boobs, butt, and toes, we WIN and the Evil Empire loses. Their strategy: let’s feed them the most unattainable 1% body-type, and force feed it until women with “normal” body types think they are the abnormal ones. Why would they do this? Money, honey. It’s all about selling creams, dyes, razors, makeup, exercise equipment, diet pills, and lots more tally-whackers and snarf-blatts we don’t truly need.
Bad news, panda bears. This marketing is reaching us in a REAL way. Did you know:
78% of teen girls are unhappy with their bodies.
13% of them have eating disorders.
50% of them are either going hungry regularly, or purging what they consume.
Sad.
TEENS. An inherently beautiful and young (but supremely impressionable) age group!
Let’s take a stroll through the fascinating history on body types.
(this historical gem can be found in Vanessa Van Edwards’ Body Types Through History)
Changing body type ideals chronologically:
ANCIENT GREECE (500-300BC): plump, full-bodied, light skinned.
HAN DYNASTY (206BC-AD220): slim waist, pale skin, large eyes, small feet.
ITALIAN RENAISSANCE (1400-1700): ample bosom, rounded stomach, full hips, fair skin.
VICTORIAN ENGLAND (1837-1901): desirably plump, full-figured, cinched waist (corset craze).
More recently in our Western history:
ROARING TWENTIES (1920’S): flat chest, down-played waist, bobbed hair, boyish figure. (This one is closest to my body type).
GOLDEN AGE OF HOLLYWOOD (1930’S-1950’S): curves, hourglass figure, large breasts, slim waist.
SWINGING SIXTIES (1960’S): willowy thin, long slim legs, adolescent physique.
SUPERMODEL ERA (1980’S): athletic, svelte but curvy, tall, tones arms (exercise obsessed period).
HEROIN CHIC (1990’s): waifish, extremely thin, translucent skin, androgynous.
POSTMODERN BEAUTY (2000’s-today): flat stomach, “healthy” skinny, tan, large breasts, large butt, thigh gap.
Question: What will the Kardashians do with their butt implants once flat butts are a thing again? Judging from history, this could happen in about 20 minutes!
My point is this: At some period in history, you likely had the ideal body type somewhere in the world. Don’t let someone tell you that any body type other than yours is ideal.
Here are some exercises to help to you become more enchanted with your body:
Create cognitive dissonance by standing in front of a mirror with little to no clothing. Say out loud the things you like about your body and why.
Take a look at some photos of different body types through history. Try and visualize yourself living in the era that most idolized your body type.
Move your body- dance, walk or hike, do yoga, weight train- literally ANY type of movement that makes you feel good, and thank your body for it.
Do body scans regularly. Sit with your eyes closed, try and feel the sensation you are experiencing in every part of your body from the top of your head, slowly, down to your toes.
Be mindful of your self-talk. What are you saying to yourself about your body? Try to make small shifts from: “I hate my belly” to “I have a belly” and eventually to “I like my belly” and “I love my belly”.
Speak positively to yourself in the mirror saying things like, “Good morning gorgeous!” or “Hello beautiful, smart and kind woman!”
Overall, make a genuine effort to be totally kind and loving toward yourself. Don’t pile on when your friend tells you she hates her (insert body part here). Tell her it’s beautiful and move on. The more frequently you practice these body-positivity exercises, the more quickly you’ll see yourself as the goddess you ARE.
