Discover Your Dharma
I was pregnant with my first at 34. What’s that got to do with the mutations of the Coronoavirus? Well, nothing. But it does have something to do with knowing my life’s purpose.
Down deep, I had hoped one day I would be a mom. Once Emerson Claire came along, my world was wrapped in her. I attended to her every need most moments of the day. And 26 months later, when her brother Crew was born, not much was different except that he slept all day the first 6 weeks he was alive. They both needed me, ALL the hours, and my identity changed.
What did happen, and it’s abundantly clear in hindsight, is I lost a lot of who I was before. How? Almost every decision I made, from food choices to vacations to social events, was based around the kids. I even quit a job I loved because I couldn’t give to that job in the way it needed me to give during these baby years.
I lost Dodi.
I forgot what I liked. I forgot what I was drawn to. I forgot so much about my passions and my desires that made my life rich and joyous. I forgot my PURPOSE. My Dharma.
Ten years passes and life is slightly less kid-centered thanks to school. I found myself asking the question, “Why am I here?” I begin to remember some of the things that brought me joy before kids: learning, working, coaching, playing… and I begin to reacquaint myself with this new, slightly more evolved version of Dodi. I went to this crazy women’s conference, I got a certification in Health-coaching, I grew my fitness business, studied Intuitive Eating, and I connected on a deeper level with some old and new friends.
But the questions still beg for clarity, “Why am I here? What is my purpose?”
On this journey to figuring out my purpose, certain books, podcasts, meditations and people, have presented themselves to me. One book I recently enjoyed was, “Discovering Your Dharma” by Sahara Rose. Not all of our paths include an extended stint in Bali to figure out our purpose, (dammit!) but, Rose offers some insights into pulling from within to gain clarity and insight around why we are here and what we’re supposed to do.
Here are a few of my favorite tips from her book.
1. Doshas are the three energies that define every person's makeup. Knowing your dosha can help you live a healthier, more balanced life. Each dosha has a number of corresponding qualities that are expressed in the physical, emotional, and mental aspects of one’s being.
Take the quiz at iamshahrarose.com to learn your dosha. The doshas are: Vata, Pitta, and Kapha. Vata is creative, bringing inspiration and creativity (air). Pitta is innovative and brings ideas to life (fire). Kapha connects with people and reflects what is inside them (earth). We all have a mix of these, but it is helpful to understand yourself and your dosha more deeply. I am Pitta-Kapha, so while I am best at putting ideas into action and encouraging people, I sometimes struggle with creativity and vision.
2. Rose also provides a quiz to learn your archetype (there are 9). These are personality types much like the Enneagram or Myers-Briggs. Knowing your archetype allows you to understand yourself on a deeper level.
The 9 dharma archetypes 9 are:
Teacher
Nurturer
Visionary
Entrepreneur
Artist
Researcher
Entertainer
Activist
Warrior
My top 4 are Entrepreneur, Teacher, Entertainer, and Warrior.
3. Work on your self-talk. Write down the things that you wish to hear others say to you.
Here are some examples (mine):
“You are so courageous to chase your dreams!”
“You have helped to transform my life and my health, thank you Dodi!”
“I love your encouragement, wisdom, and programs!”
“Thank you for empowering me and believing in me!”
“You are being used for the Highest Good, Dodi!”
Now re-read and repeat these often. There is a free app called Think Up that you can program reminders to listen to these affirmations with your recorded voice. Powerful.
4. Tapping. Tapping, also known as EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique), is a powerful stress relief technique. Tapping is based on the combined principles of ancient Chinese acupressure and modern psychology. Studies have shown that Tapping decreases cortisol, the stress hormone, in your body.
Try tapping getting on the following pressure points while saying these affirmations at least three times through as you are discovering your dharma:
Top of head- Though things may be difficult now and I’m feeling uncertain,
Eyebrows- I completely love and accept myself.
Side of eyes- I am willing to overcome obstacles in order to expand.
Under the eyes- The more I commit to my purpose,
Under the nose- The more ease I experience.
Chin- Ease is a natural result of being who I am.
Collarbone- My purpose is meant to feel easy.
Underarms- I am in alignment with my purpose.
These techniques will help move the needle for you in finding your purpose. I strongly recommend you pick up “Discovering Your Dharma” by Sahara Rose to continue to journey to better understanding who you are, the gifts you were given to serve the world, and how to put those gifts into action for the highest good of all humanity.
